wedding bells

I’ve been on Pinterest…Pinning my life away about a wedding that isn’t even in the proposal stage yet. Of course I, who ordered/told my high school sweetheart in 9th grade that he’d be taking me to both junior and senior prom, am pretty SURE it’s going to happen. Prom happened. So why not? I’m sure my current/not high school sweetheart will be proposing at some time in the next 365 days.

So, I’ve been planning it. I didn’t do the whole plan-my-wedding-since-I-was-5 thing. I wasn’t that girly and romantic, and I’m still not. I’m practical. What I really want is a Justice of the Peace ceremony and then a themed party, but his parents would be upset. So now we get on the subject of expectations.

I have two options for walking me down the aisle: my grandfather/adopted father who really doesn’t like me much but would be insulted if I didn’t at least ASK him because he can be a sentimental fool when he wants to put on a show. He lives 800 miles away and probably couldn’t afford to come to the wedding anyway, so here’s hoping.

My stepfather, who is very unemotional and uncomfortable with emotion at all, but who has helped me out with picking out a car, with routine maintenance on my cars, and helped me move multiple times to different apartments. He’s like the silent, gruff version of a doting father. He’d be my first choice, but my grandpa raised me.

Expectations are frustrating. Torn between hurting people, it becomes really difficult and part of the reason I wanted a JP wedding. There’s also the question of my Maid of Honor. My childhood best friend would be SO upset if she wasn’t maid of honor, but she is married with a kid and really doesn’t have the TIME for all the duties of MoH from 800 miles away. My obvious choice would be the girl here in Nashville that has been my best friend since freshman year of college. We even work together now. It just makes sense.

So to conclude…My practical side and my mediator, keep-the-peace-coward side are at war. I am unable to decide, so I’m going to keep pinning wedding ideas (Halloween, btw) and thank my lucky stars he hasn’t even proposed yet.

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