Sometimes I forget to breathe. Like I’m waiting for the ball to drop. I’m waiting for my world to fall apart as soon as I think I’ve gotten it together. My glass is neither half full nor half empty. The damn thing is cracked.

So, every now and then, I realize I’m holding my breath. I begin a detached inner monologue

“hmm, why does my chest feel tight…oh..yes…I should inhale now. Why was I not breathing? whoops. Okay. concentrate. breathe innnn …1…2…3…out…1…2….3”

And this is how I keep it together. Just counting breaths.


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